My very dear friend Ahdz had a shaky end of 2008 when she found out she's pregnant. It was a tough position to be in to, because it's just three months since she entered a relationship, and they weren't married yet. Fears of telling her family was a bit tough for her to bear, but an even heavier cross was put on her shoulders when her boyfriend didn't want to accept her pregnancy. I haven't been in the same position, but three of my very close high school friends have been on the same road, and it was indeed tough.
If I had to put myself in her shoes, I might lose sanity. She loves the boyfriend, and the boyfriend loves her, too, but at his age, I also do understood his reasoning, but of course, any reason is never good for that. As a friend, I can only listen to Ahdz's stories. With the telephone as the thing that connects us, I just hope she was able to feel the care I have for her.
I really thought that she would be my fourth single mom friend. I was glad that she won't be a single mom because when she finally confessed to her mom, they went to the guy's house to speak with the parents, and the boyfriend's family welcomed her with open arms.
The boyfriend has also accepted the would-be baby and is now working towards planning their future. And with this he is starting to earn my trust. Weeks before Ahdz found out she's pregnant, a hurdle came into their relationship and I really disliked her boyfriend, much so when he gave my friend a choice between him and baby (you know what that means). Now, I am happy for my friend. She is a very nice friend and it hurted me to feel her sorrows through the stories she conveyed.
A wedding is set on March 14, and she asked me to be one of the bride's maids. What?!? The request felt like a cold bucket of water was splashed on my head. Does she really want me to be a bride's maid?
Anyway, all's well that ends well, indeed. However, she and her fiance are still having problems becuase Ahdz's parents (and other relatives) wanted a church wedding, while the would-be couple just wanted to do a civil wedding ceremony because it would be more practical considering their current financial status. Ahdz is the breadwinner of the family - with parents and two siblings to take care of, and her fiance doesn't really have that much to cover all the wedding expenses. Two months are clearly too short to plan a church wedding, and Ahdz was already stressed trying to divide herself to suffice all needs. In my opinion, doing a civil wedding ceremony is much better because she is already expecting a baby. Instead of paying the church, the dresses and all that - they could just use it for the baby.
I still wish my dear friend the best of life. May she remain tough.
*** Jenn ***
ps - this picture was taken 17 March 2008, at Dampa in Farmer's Market (Cubao). She and I met so she could give her 2007 Christmas present - the silver ring I am wearing (the one that looks like a wedding ring).